Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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