At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
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