apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
