There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
