i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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