I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
