Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
