I must be too annoying 4 u.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize