just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
