i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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