she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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