Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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