i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
i believe in u and ur pee
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
