it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
