she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize