We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
