My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
My cat gives me a boner
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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