oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Randomize
