After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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