And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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