alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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