Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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