I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Randomize
