I want to stick my p in your. b.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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