laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
