My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Drake has all the answers
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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