There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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