I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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