farters have to be the big spoon...
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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