We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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