Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
