Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
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