Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize