New invention idea: vibrating tampons
No stitches, just platelets and will power
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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