I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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