just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
My ass is underappreciated
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
