covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
time to smoke my breakfast
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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