just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
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