somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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