dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
