Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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