I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Randomize
