i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
