I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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