I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
