is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
