Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
please come you make the beer taste better
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
