barbara walters just said penis...
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
