i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Just invented taco cereal.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
