i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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