please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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